homesick and sad."
— Michelle K., Home (via niceol)
sext: how much black are you wearing right now
"The Man Who Lies" (1968) - Alain Robbe-Grillet
For about 5 weeks, I was the ultimately IB oxymoron. As in the ultimate anti-IB. The IB student being a quiet, reserved, good, aspiring doctor. Doesn’t go to parties, doesn’t do drugs, get drunk, have sex. I usually am fairly polar to the generalized IB student. But for those five weeks I was so so teenage dirtbag that I can’t begin to bring myself to explain why.
I babysat tonight. I put the two little boys to bed after playing cars with them for a bit. The baby- who was already down when I’d arrived at my babysitting gig- started crying. So… long story short, I ended up lying down on a couch with a baby on my lap grasping my thumb with her little hand and her eyelids shut tight. While I was watching Sex and the City. I’m so sorry baby. That’s when it kind of hit me though, the maternal instinct. It was weird because I loath babies.
This whole entire situation is confusing and I don’t know how to feel and I don’t know what to do.